Sorting and Stuff
I had a bit of a morning yesterday — I cried and cried and cried and couldn’t place why, though I did have some ideas (professional frustration, locational frustration, general sadness and a feeling of relief that after a year and a half, I’m going to see my mom). And then I went to the bank where I found a deposit from the New York Times in my account, yes for my writing. And that felt good, but not so good that I didn’t cry on the bike ride in the sunshine to go have lunch with two funny women and then, followed that up with tea with Kiala, one of my favorite people on the planet. And I had a blast with my girlfriends and still felt like crying afterward.
I tried to sort out this blogging stuff. On the one hand, there’s the funny. On the other hand, there’s me crying.
And really this blog is about my journey as a writer, making my way as a professional writer despite so many people saying no one makes it as a writer. This is a favorite mantra of Portland writers who are, in fact, not making it as writers. They tell this to me. I think this is advice is very clever. Like McSweeney’s is clever.
But yes, not even a check from the New York Times is enough to stop the tears.
And I know that the internet is a permanent record of everything I write. I know that I could lose jobs because of things I’ve written here.
And I want to be funny. I believe people want to read funny things.
I also know that a writer can’t hit the same note every single day. You cannot write a knitting blog about knitting every single day, a humor blog that’s funny every single day, a tech blog that’s about tech thingies every single day. You will bore the shit out of your audience.
But, then it’s personal.
So, I don’t know. I have no idea what the future of this wee blog holds.
But I’ll make you a promise.
I promise you a vimeo based on a new project I have in the wings. I promise that by tomorrow evening.
For now, I’ll tell you that I’m no longer writing for Bookslut. I’ve decided to focus on other writing, and I wanted to be open to different sorts of things, so I resigned my columns there. Here’s Jessa’s announcement on it. I wrote for Bookslut for more than a year. It was a great experience. And now there’s a vacuum. I’m excited to see what fills it.
I started my blog for me. I treat it as the therapy that I won’t take time out for, a place to force myself to write-not because I want to be a writer-but because I want to be a better teacher, and I also write it knowing that I will not always interest my audience. I write it to interest ME.
When I don’t feel like writing, I don’t.
If you don’t want to keep writing a blog, don’t.
But I’d still like to do coffee with you someday.
Be patient, you’ll figure it out. You’re smart like that.
I enjoy reading your adventures in writer-dom interspersed with life in general and raising a toddler. Reminds me of me. Except replace the writer part with being a paralegal who wishes she could be a writer. Listening to your funny reminds me so much of the wonderful people I was surrounded by in high school that had such sharp wit that I thought they all should be in the entertainment industry in some fashion, you included. But that doesn’t mean that your wit is all you are. I connect with your blog and your words because they are real, be it funny or not. 
I’m one of your favoritest people on the planet!
You wrote other things but I can’t think about anything other than that!
Whee!!!!
Ok, ok, so yes. Take a blogging break, but don’t stop blogging. And if you do top blogging, well then you will just have to write somewhere else, like say in a public type forum (maybe a log of some sort?) on the interwebs where everyone can come and look at what you’ve written. Every day.
Nice redesign! What did you write for the Times? That’s amazing. I like the fact that each of your posts has a different feel to it, whether its humor, how-to or personal. Its varied and interesting and lovely, just like you.
Love the picture! So fabulous. Just like you. Chin up lady!
I like the new look.
Like everyone has said, if you don’t want to blog, you should just take a step back. If you miss it, come back, if not move on.
Also, I think everything I write is funny all the time. EVERY DAY.
Your new photo is interesting, it shows us more of you. I like that.
Don’t worry about being funny all the time or smart all the time or whatever, just be you. That is what we come here for: YOU.
Are you at Rasmussen Farms in Hood River in your new photo? We were just there this past weekend and those chairs caught my eye. I enjoy your blog and hope you enjoy it too.
Hey, I understand what you mean. I’m doing my blog for much the same reasons – chronicling the progress towards the goal of being a professional writer – and it’s hard.
I mean, writing is a personal thing, and not only are you sharing it with others, but you’re sharing it on a semi-daily basis, and with quality, rather than “Oh hey, got a check. Woo-hoo, time to get my drink on!” posts.
It’s hard to not feel that your personal self has to get involved.
Take some time and sort things out. If you want to give it a rest, give it a rest. Get some productive writing done, and don’t always feel obligated to your audience.
They like you because you’re writing things that you like; not because you’re writing things they’d like.
Wait a second. “Whoohoo, I got a check, time to get my drink on” is not considered a legitimate post?!?
I.beg.to.differ.
if you decide to stop writing i promise i will never read you again.
@ Kiala
It COULD be legit, but only if it’s ironic.
I went to a bowling alley once, with a guy whose LIFE was bowling. Leagues, shirts, nights, Saturdays. Heaving heavy balls. Over and over and over. I looked down the lanes and at that incessant, germy ball spitter outter and was like, really? What’s the appeal? He lit UP and said it’s about consistency. It’s about averages. You want to stay at the top of your game, but realistically, you know won’t be great at it all the time. So you keep playing. When the pins are crashing, you’re out of your head happy. When you’re gutter balling, you’re just in it for the game, heaving heavy balls till your luck and maybe skill turns up again.
Never got into bowling myself, but I do change shoes before I blog.
Thanks for checking out my blog! Yours rocks like a house afire. Even when it’s balls.
Look at your new fancy blog. This is nicer. Blogs aren’t anything, really. I think they are a conversation you are having with yourself, and then people get to chime in. This isn’t how real life conversations work. No one talks for 15 minutes, then waits for others to chime in with their individual thoughts. It doesn’t work that way. And there shouldn’t be a theme if it is personal. It’s called melissalion.com not knittingfunnykidswritingjunk.com. So don’t worry about a theme. Who cares about visitors? Just write what you think is good. The internet is dumb. There, I said it!
Cut the internet! Maybe even quit blogging? If it feels like it is a chore, then don’t do it. Don’t write here. You don’t owe anyone anything.
Blogs aren’t business! They aren’t anything but an outlet and a fun way to connect with people. But they aren’t the next best thing – they are actually pretty damn silly. I mean – right? You can’t connect personal outpourings with business models and stuff. I like what you write on here. Just type. I’ll take my own advice soon. Or not. Don’t type. Delete everything. Blogs are stupid, and awesome!
In the long run, the internet is silly! Real life will always take over.
Melissa Lion!