More Pie

Thank you all for your support. I’m only about $29,999,999 away from my Vice Presidential money-raising goals. But I have been out of the country more times than Sarah Palin has and that counts for something. Or nothing. Depending on your party affiliation.

I made a pie last night. The picture is not that great, and the pie is not going to win any beauty contests, but it was so tasty. I used V’s farmhouse apple pie recipe (and three time Malibu Pie Festival winner) and wow it is so good. I picked the apples from my neighbor’s tree. I think those are Pink Lady apples on that tree — the pink lady’s pledge is to look cooooool to feel cooooool and to be coooooooool (I loved Grease 2, people). The apples are just so good in pie. The crust shattered a bit when I cut into it, but it oh it’s good.

The pie was a celebration pie. Steve got a promotion and I reached a goal that I set for my writing. I set the goal a year ago and it’s been on my mind every single day and I’ve blogged about it and told every person I know. And then yesterday, in my email, was the assignment at the pay rate I’ve been aiming for.

I’d like to say it was magic, but it wasn’t. I have V to thank for 99% of this email. The 1% is my talent and hard work. My former teacher Michael Chabon said “You need three things to make it as a writer: luck, talent and discipline.”

V has nurtured my career for the past year. I’ve followed her advice exactly and here I am. I’ve said to her a number of times thank you and I can’t believe she’d do this for me. And she’s always said that I need to pass the advice and the support along. And I have been with a few friends, answering questions, giving advice and editing work. It always makes me so happy and just adds value to my own work.

The other thing I wanted to write about on this Saturday is my experience shopping at Nordstrom on Thursday. I had plenty of money to spend, I ended up getting a pair of jeans in a size 8 (yay riding my bike all over hell and back) and despite the two most important elements to a good shopping experience, I was standing in the department and this wave of depression crashed over me.

I’ve worked at Nordstrom. I haven’t shopped in one in years. Related? Maybe. But I just stood there, paralyzed by such an acute depression I could hardly move. And the faque tanned sales woman kept shoving jeans in my face and jackets and sweaters and more jeans and I was barely functional.

I left and felt better, but while I was in that store I was seriously dysfunctional. It was bizarre. I think it was a combination of the synthetic fabrics and the fact that the styles were just too ugly for words. And that it was just so much crap. CRAP.

I don’t wear synthetic fabric because when I have in the past, I really feel suffocated. I wear cotton and wool. I understand that the dyes used to make my cotton and wool items are toxic, but I was standing among the rayon, polyester, spandex items and thought, if there’s a fire, this place is going to ignite like a torch. And then these clothes are going to MELT TO MY SKIN.

I bought the jeans, had them hemmed because, seriously, why are women’s jeans so damn long? And then ran away from that horrible place.

This is all to say that my first act as your Vice President is to OUTLAW NORDSTROM.

Pray for Change. Ban Rayon. Melissa Lion for Vice President.