Me at 6:55am
Posted on | April 24, 2008 | 22 Comments
This blog post is dedicated to Surviving Myself who wants to hear me speak and to Kiala Krazybee — my muse.
Recovering Straight Girl posted today about going to hang out with the Governor of Oregon. Because RSG is a lezzie a writer, she hasn’t worn tights or pantyhose for many moons and has forgotten, I’m sure happily, what the rules are to this plain oppression of women fashion choice. So I reminded her about the perils of tights and pantyhose and she was a little at a loss because when you meet the Governor, you need to look proper. For me, as a Californian, that means rolling up in a Hummer and transforming into a robot when shit pisses me off. For Oregonians, that means dressing nicely.
I gave her some advice on the matter: get cotton tights and don’t wear panties. And then she included my advice in her blog post. But she didn’t say why, because boys read her blog. Well, boys read my blog too. Well, they are manly men who aren’t afraid of the truth and the functions of women’s bodies. Anyway, her readers are confused about tights and panties. And my male readers are strong, masculine men who are fearless.
So I filmed my response.
[vimeo vimeo.com/936340]
Tags: I'm a fashion expert > pantyhose > Vimeo confuses me
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22 Responses to “Me at 6:55am”
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April 24th, 2008 @ 7:54 am
is it just me or does what Archer’s watching sound like porn?
April 24th, 2008 @ 8:06 am
Apollo: Happy Feet is porn. Penguin porn. It makes Steve and I want to drive a boning knife into our eardrums.
April 24th, 2008 @ 8:16 am
Dammit! I can’t hear the video because everyone here is talking!
Shut Up People!!!
April 24th, 2008 @ 8:18 am
She’s right you know.
April 24th, 2008 @ 8:18 am
Pantyhose are horrible, horrible things. I hate them.
And I can name at least one boy who reads your blog who is decidedly NOT comfortable with lady business. At. All.
And it’s not my husband.
And his name rhymes with appleseed.
April 24th, 2008 @ 8:20 am
hey!
April 24th, 2008 @ 8:21 am
I don’t think I could be more confused with all this.
April 24th, 2008 @ 8:56 am
Kristen: Get muzzles. Apollo loves lady business, he pretends like he doesn’t, but when he’s at the gym in the locker room, it’s all he talks about.
Bold: Thank you.
Brew: Ask the Mrs. She’ll explain it.
April 24th, 2008 @ 9:07 am
hey wait… you have a FACE? wtf?!?
i don’t know what the concern is: sometimes i’m just in the mood for a roast beef sandwich, and nothing makes it better than having it au jus.
April 24th, 2008 @ 10:07 am
Wait, what? I couldn’t hear it. BOOO.
I hope it was about crotch rot, though.
I CAN’T BELIEVE I JUST SAID THAT.
April 24th, 2008 @ 11:34 am
Thank you Melissa. That was a great PSA.
April 24th, 2008 @ 11:52 am
Ride: I usually need to keep my face covered. With a veil. Because that’s how we do things around here.
KK: I said pantyhose make vaginas smell bad.
RSG: When will it air on CBS and the Lesbian Channel?
April 24th, 2008 @ 11:52 am
melissa you know me too well.
April 24th, 2008 @ 12:33 pm
Pantyhose makes your vagina smell bad? I didn’t know that…I wear tights, cotton tights with underwear and my vagina doesn’t get smelly.
If you perhaps leave male bodily fluids in your body after intercourse, that definitely makes for smelly pussy. Especially if you don’t shower.
That’s my PSA, probably only helpful to myself.
April 24th, 2008 @ 12:51 pm
OK, I get it now. Transcript was required. I thought you said it made them SMALL. So there was my confusion. I understand smells and genitals.
April 24th, 2008 @ 2:12 pm
Your voice was so quiet compared to the background, glad that you had the nerve to type it.
Is that an Alaska Starbucks cup? (see the details that come out) I’ve got some, not Alaska though, nice and big, great for tea (or is that blasphemy to a coffee company?)
April 24th, 2008 @ 2:45 pm
Ok, so it was about crotch rot.
Gah! I said it again!
April 24th, 2008 @ 3:09 pm
I am happy to report that when I took my pantyhose off yesterday–there was no smell. I checked.
April 24th, 2008 @ 4:02 pm
I have a feeling this will change my life. That was a very successful PSA.
April 24th, 2008 @ 9:39 pm
Ugh… the thought of nasty smelling couchie is not a good one. PSA’s in this area are truly welcome!
April 25th, 2008 @ 7:41 am
I love the subtle eye shift……..
April 26th, 2008 @ 10:18 am
More ML PSAs, please! More! More! More!
Oh, and that’s the Happy Feet rendition of “Kiss” by Prince in the background.
Act your age, not your shoe size and maybe we can do the twirl.